The Unf*ck Your Fitness Podcast

187. Redefining Fitness on YOUR Terms: What Does It Actually Mean to You?

• Kristy Castillo

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In today’s episode, I want you to get crystal clear on what fitness ACTUALLY means to you.


I’m not talking about what your Instagram feed is telling you, or what your old Beachbody program claimed it should be. If you’re serious about unf*cking your fitness, this is the first step - you can’t skip it!


I used to think fitness meant burning the most calories, chasing a smaller body, and hating my workouts. For years, I had ZERO clue what I was doing, because I was following someone else’s definition of what I thought I “should” be doing.


Now? Fitness for me means feeling STRONG over being skinny. It means knowing when to rest without guilt, and having the clarity and confidence to listen to my body!


Think about - what does being “fit” feel like for you, and what do you want your body to be able to do? What BS beliefs are you still holding onto about what fitness should be?


You don’t need to follow my routine, or what you see some influencer doing. Your goals and your season of life is what matters, and YOU are in control of your journey!


This episode is your permission slip to stop following the outdated fitness “rules” that don’t serve you, and redefine fitness on YOUR terms!


In this episode, we cover:

  • Being mindful of the fitness content you consume + making sure it aligns with you
  • How my definition of fitness has evolved over time
  • Why confidence is a total game-changer on your journey
  • Journal prompts to help you define fitness on YOUR terms
  • Why fitness isn’t a “look”, but a FEELING that’s all yours
  • How this ties into body recomp & sustainable results
  • Redefining fitness for your current season + giving yourself permission to pivot


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Speaker 1:

Welcome to the Un-Fuck-Your-Fitness Podcast. I am your host, Christy Castillo, and I'm here to give you real talk and cut the BS so you can actually enjoy building a body you love. I'm a personal trainer obsessed with giving you simple action steps to take you from feeling stuck to feeling sexy. Let's go. Hey guys, what's up? Welcome?

Speaker 2:

to today's episode. We're going to be talking about fitness today no shit, since this is the Unfuck your Fitness podcast but we're going to be talking about it in terms of either redefining what fitness means to you or defining what fitness means for you, and I'm talking about what it really means for you. This is probably going to require a little bit of homework on your end, because I really want you to dive into what the fuck does fitness mean for you? I can sit here and tell you what it means for me. It's a lot different now than what it used to mean for me. I can get on social media and I can see any content creator in the fitness industry talking about what fitness means to them, and essentially, you know what content that person is putting out. Even what I put out on social media for content is it's in relation to what fitness means for me and what fitness means for my clients, but that doesn't necessarily mean that that's your version of fitness, right? So there's two kind of reasons that I wanted to bring this topic up is because that one, for example, when you're on social media and you're seeing someone doing their version of fitness, because if you're on Instagram, for example. That's mostly where I work. That's mostly where I gather content, or what am I trying to say? View content. That's where I watch content.

Speaker 2:

I'm seeing some people talk a lot about food and I'm seeing some people talk a lot about Pilates, and I'm seeing some people talk a lot about food and I'm seeing some people talk a lot about Pilates, and I'm seeing some people talk a lot about weightlifting. It's their version of fitness. It's what they're doing in the gym. This you know. One girl is showing her Pilates class or her spin cycle class or her CrossFit class. I'm sharing my workouts in my gym. I'm sharing my food, right? So everybody online that you see, that you watch, that's their version of fitness that they're showing you.

Speaker 2:

That doesn't mean that that's your version of fitness or that it aligns, and so a lot of times, the things like I'll get asked questions what do you think about this supplement, or what do you think about this workout move, or what do you think about this? Content creator, and my response is going to be based on my knowledge, my education, my experience, my thoughts, my bias or whatever. Right, what would be nice is if you had the tools to be able to look at someone or someone's content, or their food, whatever they're showing, and think to yourself does this align, is this what fitness means for me? And if not, if that's not helpful content, get out of there, right. I can do that now because I have a very, very clear vision and a very, very clear idea of what I need and what I want. And that's perfect, because I feel very content. If I see a supplement or I see a workout or I see whatever it is in the health and fitness field, I don't care, it doesn't bother me, it doesn't affect me because it doesn't align with my goals, and I know that I can very easily move on.

Speaker 2:

But I had to go through a lot of things to be able to get to this confidence of where I'm at now. But you can do this now by just simply defining what fitness means for you. If someone would have said to me right after having babies what do you want to feel like, what do you want to look like, what are you able to fit into your schedule? Let's sit down and define what fitness really, really means for you, christy, that would have really solidified things in what I did, going forward and my confidence, because I had no freaking idea.

Speaker 2:

Okay, so what fitness used to mean for me is fitness really meant shrinking my body, and I was pretty small to begin with. But fitness in my mind still meant shrinking my body, punishing workouts the harder the workout program. I remember doing Insanity on Beachbody and thinking there's no way I'll ever be able to do this workout program without dying every three minutes, and I thought that was what I had to do to get the body that I wanted. Fitness meant dying during a workout and pretty much hating the workouts. It meant being smaller. It meant chasing the scale. I was pretty much only I would look in the mirror and want to see muscles, but I also didn't want to be bigger, which is you can't really do that. So it would have been nice to have that clear vision for myself, because then I would have known if I'm gaining muscle, the scale isn't going to move or it's going to go up sometimes and I will look different, I will feel different, my clothes will fit different.

Speaker 2:

I didn't know any of that. So fitness meant to me shrinking my body, punishing workouts the harder the workout, the better. The more sweat, the better. The more calories burned on my Apple Watch, the better and chasing the scale. Why? Because one, I had no clue what I was doing. I had no definition of fitness. I didn't know. I was using everyone else's examples Beachbody's definition of fitness and health and what you should look and feel like. That became mine because I didn't know any better and I adapted that. Or I would see someone online their body looked great, they talked like, they felt great, they feel so good, they love their workouts and this is the workout program they're doing. So I bought it. I very easily bought into that. External pressures, the social media part, the culture piece that was a really big part of what fitness meant for me. But it wasn't really what fitness meant for me. If you would have asked me, I probably one wouldn't have been able to be very clear because I didn't know. But had I had the opportunity to walk around the topic, I could have come up with. What does fitness mean for me? What do I truly, truly want? If someone would have sat down with me like this episode, someone like myself and really asked me questions and dove deep and really got into it right, I would have been able to figure that out.

Speaker 2:

Now my definition of fitness has evolved, so redefining what fitness means to you constantly is a good idea. I have clients come to me quite a bit and they'll say this is what I want. I don't ask what's your version of fitness, but I, you know what are your goals, what do you want to look like, what do you want to feel like? They're like yeah, this isn't actually what I give them is working towards that goal. But they'll say I can't fit this in or I actually don't like this. And they feel comfortable coming to me and I'm like perfect, let's change it. Let's change your definition of fitness. Let's change your definition of what you should look like, what you should feel like, what this should be like. Let's change it because it's your body, it's your life, it it's your life, it's your workouts, it's your food intake right, let's change it. Put you in the driver's seat.

Speaker 2:

So I think for me, when I thought, oh, I can do this based on how I want to look and how I want to feel, and it's okay to want to be stronger and it's okay to not want to kill myself in these workouts like not feel like I'm literally dying when I am doing these workouts, that's okay because I didn't know any other way. But life experiences, getting education, honestly burning myself out and realizing this isn't going to work Like I. Like the way that I look for the most part, like when I was doing P90X and all that and I should say Beachbody workouts and just in that phase of life. It's not the Beachbody workouts themselves they are not great, but it wasn't just that part. It was that era of my life of doing all the things and I burnt myself out and thought I do like the way that I look in a bikini and in my shorts. I look great. But there's no way I can keep this up right. It's kind of like cutting out carbs or getting to a certain number on the scale by doing very hard things, very unsustainable things. You do them, you get to the end and you think I look great, I hit the number on the scale. This is fantastic. I did the work, but I'm burnt out. I don't wanna keep doing it. I'm so glad I'm at the end. I'm so glad I'm at the end. I'm so glad this is the last day of that 90-day program, because I could not do another day of that. That's not how I wanted to feel and that's how I was feeling I had also been injured Like I hurt even.

Speaker 2:

Actually right now I hurt my back, which sucks, but I remember doing a different like a body recount program and my posterior chain was just in so much pain I had just messed it up so badly lifting so heavy. That's how I learned that wasn't necessarily for me. I learned that as a mom, I'm going to have different seasons of life, different seasons of sports with my kids. They're going to be sick, they're going to have events, they're going to have things come up that I'm going to have to rearrange my life around. So I have to be flexible and now, 44 years old, perimenopause, I'm having some heart blood pressure issues, heart rate issues, like things happened where now my focus is more on my fitness, looks more like health and more whole foods, more clean foods, choosing better things, choosing heart, healthy options, going for walks, going for some runs if I want to, and lifting moderate to heavy. Right, that's how it's evolved, was based on my life and that's exactly how it should be. It kind of feels.

Speaker 2:

Sometimes I'll have clients say things that are like well, I'm not able to do this because of my kids, or I'm not able to do this routine because of X, y and Z or this is too heavy for me because I have a knee injury or whatever it is and they feel like they're failing, they feel like that's bad, like they shouldn't change, like they feel like they're giving up and it's not. That is a pivot in the right direction of how you are feeling and how you need to move your body and what that means to you. If you have an injury or you have a certain schedule conflict, then you have to change things based on your schedule, like it's not gonna work any other way. So fitness to me now means being strong over skinny. It means having energy to live my life. It means having mental clarity. It means if I want a rest day, I take a freaking rest day, even if it wasn't scheduled. If I plan out my whole week and then one day my body says no, if you pick up a weight, I'm seriously, I'm going to break your bones. If my body says no, then that's a no and I'll either fit it in later in the week or I'll just skip that day. Skip that day.

Speaker 2:

I'm listening to my body, that mental clarity of life and the physical piece I know well enough to do what I need to do do what my body needs to do. It's about having confidence, not control. That is a huge piece that I have learned and that has really, really benefited me and that's something for you and that's something that I wish for and that has really, really benefited me and that's something for you and that's something that I wish for you and I teach my clients is that confidence piece. If you are confident that if you take a rest day and you will not gain weight, you will be fine, it's not the end of the world. That is such a game changer, rather than saying, oh my gosh, I'm having this 90-day program and if I miss this workout, I'm going to have to start all over again. You're not. You're confident in yourself. You're confident in your body, saying you need a rest day, it's fine.

Speaker 2:

So not the control piece of everything. Every single thing was so controlled and I had to feel in control of that. Now I just feel confident about what I'm doing. I don't always feel in control of it. Honestly, hardly ever anymore do I feel in control of my body. Sometimes I go out in the gym and I think this is going to be a great workout. I feel so strong. And then I lift a weight and it feels so freaking heavy and I can't get through the whole set or whatever it is. Or I feel like I'm gonna go for sprints today and I start to run and my ankle says no, you're not, we're 44. That's not control. I'm sometimes very much not in control of what my fitness looks like, but that's okay, I'm still confident along the way.

Speaker 2:

Actually, today I had planned on getting up, getting in a workout and then coming to record podcast. I got up and my back said don't you freaking dare try to do any kind of squat, at least not this morning. Let us get moving here. Okay, and that's because I hurt my back two weeks ago. But again, listening to that, I was confident that that is exactly what my body needed was rest. Now I know that fitness should serve me and not stress me. Fitness should serve you and it should not stress you, and the first piece to doing that is to define what fitness means for you. So how do we do that? Without your own definition, you're chasing someone else's goals. Like I said, without your own definition of fitness and what you know will work for you, you will always see someone doing something that you will always think you need to do, because you'll think that's the missing piece. I'm not doing Pilates, that's how it. That's it Duh, it's not Like. And I'm not saying Pilates is bad, I'm just saying there could be anything.

Speaker 2:

If you hear me talking about sprinting and you're like, oh, that thing. If you hear me talking about sprinting and you're like, oh, that's why I don't look like her, it's not because I haven't sprinted for years, it's just something that I'm trying now. It's something that I feel comfortable with now. It's something that my body needs now, and I'm sharing that with you. Fitness can look different for everyone, and it should. So you have to define your goals, because you're going to hear all of your friends saying I'm trying this, I'm doing this, this is my goal, I'm eating this. Your fitness should look different than anyone else's. It should be your journey. No one else should understand it. That's exactly how it should be. If someone's saying I don't know why you're working out all the time. I don't know why you're eating like that Good, I'm glad you don't. This isn't for you. Okay, this is for me.

Speaker 2:

If you're not clear, it's also easy to feel like you are failing when you're actually just following someone else's plans right. If you're not clear, it'll feel like, oh, I'm not doing this correctly. You're not doing it correctly based on who? If it's not you, then it doesn't matter. So be very, very, very clear. When fitness is aligned with your values, that's when it becomes sustainable. Yeah, sustainability is the only thing that matters. Consistency, obviously. If it's sustainable, you'll be consistent with it, and that's the only way you're going to get there. So you have to be able to define it for yourself, and now we are going to define it for yourself. So these are just kind of journal style prompts.

Speaker 2:

I really want you to either read this and talk it into your phone, like I want you to record it and speak. I'm more of a speaker. Okay, what does it feel like? I want you to talk it out with yourself, or sit down with a friend you really, really trust and talk it out with them, or write this down and write out your answers. But I want you to do this because it will help you so much to define what fitness means for you. Until you do that, you quite possibly might be stuck in this cycle that never ends and it's not pretty. This defining fitness for yourself can help you move forward a lot quicker than just trying things, throwing shit to the wall and hoping it sticks. This is what will really really help you.

Speaker 2:

So there are four things. Question number one what does feeling fit actually look like for me? Number two what do I want my body to be able to do? Number three what lies have I been told about what fitness should be? And number four what does success in fitness feel like to me? Okay, let go of outdated definitions. Let go of someone else's definitions. Let go of everything you've ever heard. When you sit down and talk this through with yourself or a friend I recommend yourself, because who cares what your friend thinks? Talk it out with yourself. You're talking out with me, if you need to, or write it down. But let go of everything you've ever heard about fitness and write down, or talk about what it means for you, because what it means for you, because what it means like for you, or what it looks like for you, what it means for you, what it feels like for you that matters so much, because then you can start to dig into.

Speaker 2:

Okay, what does feeling fit look like for me? What does it look like, feeling fit? What does that look like Physically. For me, feeling fit looks like so many things. The first thing I can think of is looking in the mirror and seeing an actual fit body, not a skinny body, but like a strong ass body. There's so many other things, but that's the first thing that I would say. Feeling fit is like lifting weights that make me feel super strong, flexing and seeing muscle definition, looking in the mirror and seeing some abs and being like, okay, we are filling out these genes, great. What do I want my body to be able to do? I want to be able to sprint. I want to be able to do a squat without my back hurting. I want to be able to lift up my baby. I want to be able to not my baby, but I'm just giving you examples right? I want to be able to get up off the floor without moaning and groaning. I want to be able to run a half marathon.

Speaker 2:

Whatever you want to do, what lies have you been told about? What fitness should be? That could be a very long answer, but seriously, write down what lies. You've been told that carbs are bad, that fats are bad, that lifting heavy will make you look manly Anything. Write down all of the lies because you need to see them or you need to say them to actually realize this is a lie. That I've been told that you have to clean your plate, that you're big boned, that your metabolism is slow, that your whole family is overweight and so you will be too, right, whatever it is, whatever those things are.

Speaker 2:

And then what do you think fitness, or what have other people told you fitness should be? You should be skinny, you should be a lady, you should be a runner, you should have really small features, women shouldn't be strong, right? What lies have you been told? And then, what does success in fitness feel like to you? What does it feel like Going to the gym five days a week, showing up like a badass squatting doing the leg press machine? What does it feel like a badass squatting doing the leg press machine? What does it feel like Choosing better foods, getting up in the morning and having energy? Literally write down or speak every single thing you can think of to those questions and go back to them a couple different times because, depending on the day, your brain will work a little better.

Speaker 2:

You might think of something and think, oh yeah, that's a lie. Write it down in your phone, put it in your notes section, keep it okay, but let go of all outdated or toxic definitions and make this all about you. So the big message here is fitness isn't a look, it's a feeling. It's a choice. It's yours and you have to define it, because if you don't define it for yourself, someone will define it for you, and that sucks, because then you'll always feel because, especially on social media, things are changing. Right, it used to be skinny was best and now it's like big shoulders are good and glutes big glutes are good. Eventually, glutes aren't going to be a topic anymore and it's going to go back to running and being smaller, because this shit changes, because people want to make money and it sells. So everything on social media is going to change. All these supplements are going to be gone. That's why you have to know what it feels like for you when glutes and lifting heavy go out of style. When building your glutes isn't cool anymore or lifting heavy isn't cool anymore, I'll still be doing it because for me, that's what I like and that's what I want to look like.

Speaker 2:

I would love for you to. If you are on listening on Spotify, you can share your definition with me in that like where you can ask questions and leave messages there on Spotify. I would also love if you message like put a message in the Facebook group Chris Castillo fit or the unfuck your fitness community over on Facebook. You can leave it there. Or send me a message on Instagram, or put a story up about what fitness means to you and tag me like. I would love to see your answers for this and I would love to see your thoughts on this episode, because I think it would be so powerful. Can you imagine if we get on social media and you start seeing stories of this is what fitness means to me. This is what fitness means to me. This is what fitness means to me, and it's like showing my kids a better way or running every day with my dog or feeling like a strong, badass woman, and you see all these ideas of what fitness means to everyone. You'll start to think, oh, oh, yeah, what does fitness mean for me? It'll inspire so many other people to do the same thing, so I think that that would be so, so perfect.

Speaker 2:

I think this really ties into the body recomp conversation as well, because body recomp empowers you to be able to eat more and empowers you to be able to really define what you want to look like. Right, you now know, in the body recomp world, you know that you can be strong. You know that you can eat more. You know that you can grow muscle. You know that you can lose fat. You don't have to just chase this number on the scale. You know that you can run. You know that you can do so many things and reshaping the shape of your body.

Speaker 2:

I think a lot of people think you know I have to lose weight, or I have to be skinny, or it's all about cutting carbs, all those other kind of frivolous things. The body recomp episodes where I've talked about body recomp in those episodes, those conversations have given you, have given my clients, have given so many women and men the now option to change the shape of their body instead of just being smaller and eating less or instead of having just one goal of just your jean size or the scale right. One particular thing Now it's like I can, I'm in control of how my body looks. I can literally change the composition of my body. That was so foreign to so many people.

Speaker 2:

And now, with that, now we're adding on this definition of fitness and maybe redefining fitness. If you've already kind of have a definition, if you're like, okay, no, I have a very, very or I had a very clear vision of what fitness means for me and it's just really not aligning anymore. If you need to redefine it like this is so empowering. It's empowering to know you can change the shape of your body, you can run, you can eat more right, you can be whatever version of yourself you want to be, and now you can define that for yourself Like it just gives you so much more freedom, so much more opportunity to be able to take control of your fitness journey and to be able to have that confidence.

Speaker 2:

And I think, if we're gonna really unfuck your fitness, this is the piece that we have to do, because if you're always following what, there are obviously things where I give you tips and there are exact things, exact steps, exact ways to do things and there's scientific and there's truth. But there's also pieces of it where I can't give you an exact answer. I get so many questions on Instagram and the DMs, so many questions where I have to respond with that's totally per person, that's totally based on your starting point, that's totally based on your goals, that's totally based on your starting point. That's totally based on your goals. That's totally based on your history. I cannot give you a certain answer or like should I be in a deficit, or should I be at maintenance, or should I build muscle first or should I lose fat first?

Speaker 2:

What do you wanna do? What do you want to do? Do you want to eat protein bars or do you wanna eat whole foods? What do you want to do? Do you want to eat protein bars or do you want to eat whole foods? What do you want to do? Who gives a shit what I think? I've thought all of those things. I have wanted to focus on clean foods. I've wanted to go fully vegan and raw. I have wanted to eat all the processed foods and Oreos. I have wanted to be skinny and just be a runner. I have wanted to be a freaking bodybuilder. I have wanted to like.

Speaker 2:

It changes all the time, and a lot of that came from. You know, we went to the Arnold Classic one time, my husband and I and I remember thinking I want to do this. Like you know, whatever area you're in, whatever people you're around, whatever community you're surrounded with, whatever information is being given to you in that moment. You think I want to do this. Or you see someone and you're like I want to look like that. Or you see someone doing a marathon. You're like maybe I could do that right. Whatever you're surrounded with, whatever you're being consumed with, whatever people are telling you, that's what you're going to want to do, that's what you're going to believe you can do, or that might be right. It's going to at least pique your interest for a while.

Speaker 2:

If someone came to me right now and said, hey, do you want to run a marathon? I think that would be so much fun to do together. You'd be so good at it. You're so athletic. Hard pass hard. No, I'm not doing that. Are you insane? Could I work up to that 100%? Could I train for that and do it? Absolutely, I have no doubt of my ability to do that. Do I want to? No, no, I don't. Do I really want to go to Pilates class right now? No. Do I want to do a beach body workout? Fuck, no. Do I want to eat all clean and track every single bite of food that I put in my mouth right now? No, but I have done those things and I know when I'm redefining my fitness. For example, like now for me. You know I do need to clean things up. I am drinking some green tea and I'm drinking some different pro mix um supplements, whereas I was doing first form before. I've switched up a couple of things. I'm on some new blood pressure medication. I'm going for walks, which I kind of was doing before, but longer, more intentional walks, heart-healthy things. I'm adding in more heart-healthy foods, because that is what I need to do right now.

Speaker 2:

Two years ago I didn't care about any of that. I was in survival mode. Both of my kids were in high school. I'm surviving on protein shakes. I'm surviving on protein bars. I'm wanting to be big. I'm wanting to lift heavy, and some of that is still true. I do want to lift heavy. I do eat all those things still, but I'm just cleaning it up a little bit, right. So I had to look back. I went to a couple of doctor's appointments. I'm going through all this stuff with my blood pressure.

Speaker 2:

You guys know, if you've listened to the last few episodes, I had to sit down with myself and thought what is fitness right now? What is this right now, if you're having days where you're lifting super heavy and your heart is racing and you can't do it, then you can't do it. You have to slow down. What is your priority right now? What is being fit? Look, I asked myself all those questions. That's where I got them from. What lies, have I been told? Can I have these heart problems, these blood pressure issues, and still be fit? Yeah, but a lot of people are saying I can't right. What do I want my body to be able to do? I want to lift as heavy as possible. I want to go for some runs, I want to improve my cardiovascular health, like.

Speaker 2:

These are things for me, though, so when I say these things on here, it doesn't mean that this is your version of health, that you should adopt my version of health. You probably shouldn't, because if you're a different age than me, if you're whatever, like, you don't have to adopt what I'm saying, but I think it is really good to hear other people's ideas to get like oh, I could probably do that. Could I fit that into my schedule, though? Or would it affect my strength gains? That's the thing about running is.

Speaker 2:

I ran actually last night a couple miles, probably just kind of jogging, and that felt good, because my back was hurting. I didn't really want to sprint. I had just done some heavy leg stuff, so I didn't want to sprint, but I wanted to get my steps in faster. So I was just kind of jogging around and it felt really good and I thought but I can't do this on a regular basis because that's going to confuse my body. I personally don't want to confuse my body and think are we distance running or are we gaining muscle? And my priority is gaining muscle.

Speaker 2:

So I had to kind of in that moment, redefine that and say listen, I know you're having a really good time running here, christy, listen, self, but we're not doing this all the time. Like, if your goal is this, then this is what we have to do to get there. Right, we can't mix the two. Yeah, of course, on occasion you can do a Pilates class, do a Beachbody class, eat some Oreos no-transcript on social media too, if you guys don't want to share them on yours. But when you realize that you're in control of your body, then you can also realize this is how I want to look, this is how I want to feel, these are the workouts I want to do.

Speaker 2:

Christy said that's okay if you need that permission, right, but don't even focus so much on what you want to look like, because those habits that you're going to do to feel how you want to feel are going to ultimately create the body that you want. So doing things that will help you feel the way you want to feel will ultimately help you to look the way you want to look as well. It definitely goes hand in hand. So thank you for listening. I hope this was really really helpful. Go redefine or define what fitness is for you and go kick some ass and tell me about it, because I mean, what's better than a bunch of people that actually know what the fuck they want right and are able to do it? I think that would be a huge game changer. So I hope you enjoyed this episode. I will talk to you in the next one.

Speaker 1:

Thanks for listening to today's show. Go ahead and leave a rating and a review and, of course, follow the podcast so you don't miss out on any future episodes. And I would love it so much if you came to connect with me over on Instagram at Christy Castillo Fit. I will see you next time. Bye.